


Maybe the Universe Doesn't Hate Me?

by TreatyWrites



Category: DCU
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Depression, Jason Cares, M/M, Panic Attacks, Self-Harm, Tim Drake Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:42:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23851762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TreatyWrites/pseuds/TreatyWrites
Summary: Tim wants to meet his soulmate, he's lonely and depressed and desperately needs someone in his life who cares. However, Tim believes the universe has a personal vendetta against him, which is now why he'd fighting Red Hood at every turn. But after a bad break down Tim learns that  maybe Jason isn't that bad?
Relationships: Tim Drake/Jason Todd
Comments: 3
Kudos: 209





	Maybe the Universe Doesn't Hate Me?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and thank you for reading this story. I'm in a soulmate in a soulmate vibe right now. Next up is a Bridflash fic, FYI, if you like that. Also! Do you like: Criminal Minds, Blue Bloods, or Brooklyn 99? Well I'm making a huge cross over series, so if you're interested keep an eye out of it. If you have an prompts you'd like to see written feel free to comment on them down below, and if you have any constructive criticism please comment. Once again thank you for reading this and have a wonderful morning, afternoon, and/or evening.

The universe seemed to like watching Tim fight. It seemed that he attracted trouble everywhere he went and got his ass kicked every single time. Tying into his new problem. Jason. Jason and Tim fought...a lot, violent ugly scuffles where one ended up bleeding profusely with the other one smiling victoriously. Tim had wanted to be friends with Jason, but the older man deemed to be more interested in killing him. 

You think of a place and they’ve fought there, grocery stores, rooftops, a circus tent, they’ve been through it all, spilling more blood in two months then they had individually in a year. They’ve kicked, scratched, bit, shot, hit, punched, and cut each other over and over again. With Jason making it a point to spit out the meanest insults he can think of in the moment. 

Tim hated it, but he didn’t hate Jason, in fact he sorta liked Jason. It was crappy and twisted, he knew that he had fallen in love with a person who actively wanted to hurt him...but he couldn’t help it. There was something about him that captivated him. Drew him towards him. He couldn’t explain it, but every time he looked at Jason he felt his stomach flip and heart beat a little faster. However fighting with Jason didn’t help him, at all. After Damian had been introduced it seemed like he was being forced to fight two battles, one with Jason and one with Damian. Bruce was being demanding too, he couldn’t keep up sometimes, and that crushed his self esteem sometimes. The only one who seemed to give a shit about him was Dick who had broken up so many fights for him he’d given up counting. But of course because the universe hated him, Dick was on an off world mission, leaving him alone to deal with his chaos. 

Everyone had marks on their skin, black splotches on their body indicating where their soulmate would first touch them. Tim had two, two large black dots on his forearms, as if someone was grabbing them. He never bothered with them anymore, once upon a time he’d been fixated on finding his soulmate, but that day never came, and Tim doubted that it ever will at this point as most people usually find their soulmate at his age. 

This and the continuous fighting and loneliness lead to depression and Tim became the king at hiding it. Forcing a smile or a quip became second nature, he tried to push through it he tried but soon he needed an outlet, something to let him express his pain. Thus the little razor blade became his friend. 

\---------------------------

Jason didn’t hate Tim, sure the kid annoyed him, but it was Batman that really pissed him off. Of course he’d been replaced, just like he’d replaced Dick. Honestly it shouldn’t have been new. But whenever he was Tim, his blood rose up and he picked a fight. 

Tim was smart, knew how to drag a fight out,he’d be lying if he said that didn’t concern him, plus he didn't shy away from the confrontation he so desperately wanted. But something weird had been happening. Jason began to avoid their fights, trying his hardest to avoid any confrontation. At this point he just really wanted to talk to Tim, get to know him, why? He had no fucking clue, but something had changed between them, and Jason was currently searching for the former Robin. Hoping that he wasn’t just making up these emotions in his head. 

Truth was, he couldn’t explain it very well. But he was physically drawn to Tim, something about him pulled him to the young adult and he didn’t know why. Tim was smart, clever, brilliant in every single way. Honestly, Jason was proud that this kid was his successor and that the short little ninja killer Bruce had taken in. At first he’d thought the feelings he had towards Tim was hatred, pure loathing, but he was quick to realize that that was not the case. However, whatever this feeling was it screamed to him that he wanted a change, which is why he was driving up to the manor. 

\-----------------------------

Tim and Bruce had gotten into another fight. Apparently his work was too circumstantial, the case evidence he brought Bruce was worthless in his eyes. Of course he’d been offended since the case was supposed to have been Damian’s. But because the kid had a mission with Jon, all his case work got dumped on him. Him. And now Bruce was mad at him. 

“Maybe if you’d wanted it done on time and completed you should have let Damian take care of it,” he told Bruce already feeling his patience wearing thin. 

“Tim, he has school and classes to attend. I can’t ask him to pull an all-nighter just for a case.” 

“The hell do you think I did,” he shot back, “I have school too you know! I’m not some personal computer Bruce!” How dare he think that he was less than Damian, just because he wasn’t his blood son or whatever logic put him below the demon brat. 

“You’ll get the work done when I tell you, its logic Timothy, out of everyone I’d expect you to understand.” 

Tim looked at Bruce, was he seriously doing this? Now? He felt his anger bubble up, and for a moment he was about to pull a Grayson, hell he wanted to. He wanted to chew Bruce out and give him a piece of his mind, but he didn’t. His anger simmered down and what was left was this absolutely horrible feeling of depression. He grabbed the files from Bruce. 

“Sorry,” he said, feeling himself already on the verge of tears, why couldn’t he just be good enough? “I’ll do better.” 

He walked up to his room, ignoring the stare he got from Bruce, “make sure you do,” he called out, voice low and angry. 

When Tim got to his room he tossed the worthless files on his bed, heading straight to his bathroom, he needed to do something, anything to get this awful feeling out of him, so he grabbed the blade he kept hidden under a stack of towels. It took him moments but soon he was dragging the blades across his skin, watching the blood flow. 

Tim relished the pain, dragging it across his skin right over the soulmate mark, it was dark enough that no one would see the scars of the black skin. He smiled softly, he deserved this, deserved every bit of this, after all every issue was his fault, because he wasn’t good enough. Bruce and Dick fought because he didn’t have a place, Damian was here because he couldn’t do his job. He should have never come here to this stupid manor. But in reality he was the stupid one, the idiot that didn’t deserve to be here. 

He bit his lip, muffling the sob he felt built up in the back of his throat, something telling him that this wasn’t true, that he needed to use his head. But facts were just ways to delude the truth, help him ignore his faults. He let the blood fall, drops falling on the white marble.

\-----------------------------

Jason stepped into the manor cautiously, he wanted to talk to Tim despite his better judgment, if he was honest maybe he wasn’t here, but Jason heard something a faint whimper from upstairs. He looked around uncertainty, someone might be hurt...he should help. With a sigh he walked up the steps softly, not wanting to scare anyone or any of the several dogs laying around the manor. He followed the sounds to a room, it was clean, a computer running, Tim’s room he deducted. Slowly he stepped in, the whispers getting louder and louder when he saw it.

His heart dropped, “what are you doing-” 

Tim’s head snapped up, he shook his head, tugging the sleeves down, “go away…” 

He scowled and got down grabbing Tim's forearms and looking at the cuts, barely noticing the jaw drop coming from Tim, because he was already looking for bandages. He grabbed them and when he came back Tim's arms were flipping rainbow. 

Those black marks, Jason instantly looked down at his hands, swirling with colors, “no way,” he said, Tim seeming equally shocked, “we...that’s not-we’ve…” 

Jason shook his head, they could have this discussion later, “first we’re taking care of you.” 

He grabbed the disinfectant and wrapped Tim's arms hiding the colorful marks that secretly sent Jason’s heart flying. 

“You don’t have to-” Tim muttered and Jason shushed him. 

“How about we get coffee?” 

Tim looked at him, clearly hesitated, but he nodded, and took his hand as he lifted him up. Tim muttered something about changing and Jason grabbed the discarded blade, shoving it in his jean pocket.

He entered the room as Tim was just showing a hoodie over a shirt, he looked at Jason once again with a very cautious stare. 

“Hope you don’t mind taking a ride on a motorcycle,” he tried joking, leading him to his bike, he realized he didn’t have a spare helmet so opted to let Tim wear his. It was a little too big and Jason tried to ignore the dead look in his eyes, he wasn’t used to seeing that. He sped through the city and decided to stop at a twenty four hour breakfast joint, “best mediocre coffee in Gotham,” he stated as Tim handed him his helmet. Still silent.  
He opened the door trying to be a fair gentleman, hoping that maybe Tim might snap out of whatever depression he was in. They took a seat and Jason ordered for both of them, hoping Tim would like what he chose. 

“Why are you doing this,” Tim said suddenly, “why are you suddenly being so nice.” 

He swallowed, “I uh...I guess I want to get to know you,” he muttered, it sounded stupid, why did he sound so stupid? 

Tim looked at him for a moment, “get to know me...after all our fights...I thought the last thing you’d want to do is talk to me-” 

“I want to,” he insisted, “truth is,” he admitted, “I don’t want to fight with you...I don’t think I ever did...maybe we can just talk? Hell not even talk, just ask questions about each other! I just want to know more about you. ” 

Their coffee was given and Tim took a sip, “alright then let's talk...I’ll start, why do you insist on fighting me?”

“I never really wanted to fight you,” he sighed, “I was just angry...angry at Bruce...I don’t think I ever wanted to fight you...why did you drag out our fights?”

Tim looked away fiddling with his sleeve, “I guess...I began to use you as an outlet...a way to feel something-I dragged out the fights knowing I’d get hurt more...stupid isn’t it, pathetic even.” 

“Hey, no self deprecating here,” Jason said, looking at him trying to be too harsh, “we’re going to try and keep this light.” 

Tim sighed and began fiddling with a packet of jelly, “do you hate me?” 

“No,” he said before even thinking about it, “I don’t, truth is, I’m actually fascinated by you,” he leaned and made it a point to look at Tim. His long and disheveled hair, tired but cold blue eyes, he wondered what they looked like when he was happy. Honestly the longer Jason looked at Tim the more beautiful he became, or maybe he was always this gorgeous and he was just to blind to see it until now. 

\---------------------------------

Tim squirmed under his gaze, and Jason was positive that he had no idea on how to accept the compliment. 

Tim didn’t know what was going on. His heart was pounding and he felt like he was going to throw up. It was impossible for him to ignore that he definitely had feelings for Jason. And now Jason was his soulmate, the person that he liked and had tried to kill him was his soulmate, who to add on to his problem, had caught him right in the middle of a depressive episode. Yet here they were, Jason treating him to breakfast while answering questions. Tim didn’t know how or what to feel. 

And then he heard the question he was dreading, “are you okay?”

He looked at Jason, he wanted to cry and tell him that he was fine. Perfectly fine...but the words fell dead on his tongue. Jason was looking at him with so much concern that Tim didn’t know if he could lie. 

“...I dunno,” he muttered, brain running a thousand miles a second, trying to play the biggest game of catch up ever. 

“Was it something I did,” Jason questioned further. 

He shrugged hopelessly, ‘I don’t know, I just...so many things happened and I just-Jason I can’t-” and now he was crying, he was crying in front of Jason. He buried his face in his hands trying to muffle his sobbing but it was impossible. 

“Hey, shit, don’t cry,” Jason tried. 

But he couldn’t stop, it was like everything he’d been internalizing was pouring out and he couldn’t stop it, “i’m sorry,” he tried, “I’m so sorry-” 

“No, it’s...hey it’s okay, just breath.” 

He followed Jason’s instructions, realizing how badly his lungs needed air, “just breath,” he repeated.

“Yeah that’s right, breath, in and out.” 

He took in the large deep breaths and was finally able to look at Jason, who looked equally terrified as he felt about his break down. 

“Thanks,” he said as they had their plates of breakfast, Jason smiled, passing him silverware. 

“That's why I’m here,” his small smile dropped for a moment, and Jason rested his hand on top of his, “but Tim seriously, whatever’s been going on...it’s not your fault. Okay? I just want you to know that people care, even if it doesn’t seem like it people care...I care-after all,” his smile came back, “we are soulmates.” 

Tim felt his heart flutter, soulmates, “you...you actually want that?” 

Jason smiled, a small smirk and Tim would take it, “if I’m honest….the thought seems nice...but if you don’t want to jump into a relationship I respect that. I want to take it as slow as you need.” 

They ate their food chatting lightly, and Tim sounded himself falling for Jason even more. He was actually sweet, obviously cared about things. It was such a shame they got off to a rocky start, but Tim found that with each passing second that shaky beginning was slowly disappearing. 

When they were done Jason insisted on paying and like a true gentleman, he drove him home, all the way to the manor. He got off and smiled. 

“Thanks Jay.” 

“Well I couldn’t let you walk home could I,” he quipped back. 

He nodded and went to walk up the stairs when Jason grabbed his arm lightly, “Tim wait….” 

He scribbled something down at the coupon and handed it to him, “if you want...or ever need someone to talk to...call me.” 

He couldn’t hide his smile, if he could he would have definitely kissed Jason. 

“One more thing,” he said, looking at him, and before Tim really had time to register Jason was kissing him. Him. Not hitting or attacking, but kissing. He leaned into it, relishing at how right it felt. 

They broke apart, both smiling like fools. Jason smiled, flashy and cocky, “it isn’t a date without a goodnight kiss.”

“I guess it’s not,” he replied, he hesitated for a moment but decided that it was a decent question, “I don’t suppose you’d want to get lunch with me tomorrow?” 

Jason nodded, his smile getting wider, “sounds like a plan, text me where you want to go and I’ll pick you up at one, yeah?” 

“Yeah.” 

Jason let him go and he walked up the stairs turning around to see the tail end of Jason's motorcycle. His arms were itchy now, but Tim didn’t mind. He thought about tonight, thought about everything that went right. He grinned into the sky, taking in the moment, the warm summer air, the rare clear night sky. Maybe life didn’t hate him that much after all.


End file.
